Hardship Hits Hardest at Home

My suddenly very adult brother,
Abuti Thabo, at the mine. 

I stare at the screen of my phone and blink back tears of frustration and anger as I reread my brother's text message: "I miss you too my sister. I don't think I will come for writing [my exams] because they are disallowing me to come write."

One week before receiving this frustrating text, I had been sitting in the hall at my brother's school; beaming as he received the Leadership Award. Now, I am sitting in that same hall doing Camp BRO. I am forced to be on my game-inspiring young men to be positive leaders for social change-when all I want to do is mourn the future I imagined for my brother.

My amazing and inspiring brother will not be completing secondary school at the end of November as planned. He will not be writing the intense Form E exams to earn his certificate—the Lesotho equivalent of a diploma.

Instead, he is now an employee at a platinum mine in South Africa; taking on the job his father held before his untimely death a decade ago due to “mine-related illness.” Because the mine acknowledged responsibility for his illness, they have been holding a position for my brother for the past decade.

Camp BRO Butha Buthe-Empowering Men in Gender Equality

Boys practice leadership by leading one another through a
minefield of over one hundred chairs.

It is Saturday morning. I stand up to add a few questions to my friend and fellow PCV Rachel's session on power in relationships and consent. 

She had started the session with a fantastic game in which some of the boys had all the power and the remaining boys were powerless; in this case, forced to do whatever the other boys told them to do. As her discussion wound down, it seemed like not everyone has followed the jump from their feelings during the game to the discussion in sexual relationships. 

I ask them why girls do not walk along near sunset. "Because they will be raped Madam," a bright young man named T'sepo tells me. I then ask why girls will travel longer routes to avoid bars or isolated areas. A multitude of boys jump in, replying, "They will be raped."

I explain that unwanted sex is painful-physically, mentally, and emotionally. I ask them if they want their mothers, their sisters, and their future wives living through something so devastating. I share that Lesotho has the third highest rate of reported rapes in the world. The boys quickly point out that most women do not report because they will be beaten, stigmatized, or even killed.

I remind the boys that they have been chosen as leaders for Camp BRO-Boys Respecting Others-and as leaders in their schools and communities, they are the ones with the power to change things.

I see nods of agreement with all these things until a boy in the front row politely asked, " But Madam, what if a girl is torturing me by wearing a short skirt?"

From there, the discussion gets lively as my Mosotho friend Julia and I try to encourage their discussion and open their minds.

Three Photo Thursday-20 October

Boys raise their hands, eager to participate in the session on Power in Relationships and Consent.

I spent most of this week at Camp BRO Botha Bothe. My friend and the local Ministry of Youth representative organized this boys’ camp to promote gender equality and opened it up to participants from every single school in the district! It was an amazingly good time-and my favorite of the camps I have helped out at thus far in Lesotho. Come back on Monday for more on Camp BRO BB!

Emily rolling her first tortillas!

One of the best parts about Peace Corps’ Pre-Service Training is that we try to follow the Experiential Learning Cycle throughout the training process. For example, when trainees arrive in Lesotho, they move into a host family’s home and begin living like Basotho immediately. Then, in their language and culture sessions, they discuss what that is like before learning why things happen the way they do and reflecting on the experience. Another great example of this is called HVV or the Host Volunteer Visit. This week, all fifty-seven trainees visited currently serving volunteers to see how we live and work in our various communities. When they return to training, they will share and reflect on their experiences to gain a better idea of the life of Peace Corps Volunteers throughout Lesotho. My guest for the week was a trainee named Emily. The people in my village were-as always-thrilled to meet another volunteer and loved when she tested out her growing language skills by greeting them and discussing where she currently lives. Emily, in turn, loved the chance to learn how to cook like an American in Lesotho—especially how to bake on a stovetop and how to make tortillas!

Giving instructions to grade five in Sesotho and English.

As always, teaching life skills is a highlight of my week whenever I am at site. This week, sadly, I did not get to teach my oldest students as they have begun writing their nationalized exams to complete primary school. I taught the younger students about the physical changes that occur during puberty. In both grade four and grade five, the teachers were thrilled that I was discussing puberty with the children. In grade six, we had already covered puberty, so today we discussed HIV. Eleven students volunteered to pull an item out of my grab bag. They then had to explain to everyone else what that item had to do with HIV transmission. For the most part, they did a great job, however, I had them completely stumped when a boy pulled out a spoon. It was a trick item, as a spoon has nothing to do with HIV transmission-sharing silverware with or eating food prepared by an HIV positive individual will not transmit HIV and ensuring everyone understands that is just one way of trying to decrease stigma around HIV. 

Camp BRO

The Camp BRO bros

“I want to start a hospital that has a neurosurgeon,” a young man says in response to fellow PCV

Danielle’s question asking for the fifty boys what their goals are.

It is Saturday morning and I am exhausted after staying up the night before doing evening activities with the same boys. I am exhausted but profoundly happy.

Camp BRO [Boys Respecting Others] is the male equivalent to the Camp GLOW I co-directed in September. Unlike in September, however, I am not in charge this time. This means that I have the energy and enthusiasm to lead energizers and activities and to joke around with the guys.

Nt Lebohang from the Business
Economic Development Corporation
leads a session on business.

Yolanda, an amazing woman that lived in my training village back in Pre-Service Training, has done an astounding job planning the camp. Nearly all the sessions-covering topics including goal setting, leadership, business skills, career development, gender, and sexual reproductive health-have at least one host country speaker or organization leading the session. This helps the participants to connect with a number of professionals in their community but also dramatically increases the amount of effort Yolanda has had to invest in communicating and planning.

Danielle smiling during her HIV test.

Not long after Danielle and Adrian's session on goal setting, a woman from the local clinic arrives to offer HIV testing throughout the day. Since the boys are in a session on business development, Danielle and I jump on the opportunity to take HIV tests. After the session concludes, we skip into the hall and share the testing opportunity by showing them our testing strips. Abuti Khotso, a sassy and fun young man, challenges me, “Would you show us if you were HIV positive?” I surprise him by letting him know that yes, I would in fact show them my results even if I had HIV. He notes that HIV is a death sentence, which opens the door for Danielle and me to share that if an HIV positive person takes anti-retrovirals correctly, HIV is now less dangerous than other common conditions in Lesotho like high blood pressure or diabetes.

Later in the day, I am co-facilitating the session on Sexual Reproductive Health with some volunteers from the Lesotho Red Cross. As I discuss the female reproductive system, I am again surprised as most of the many questions I am asked are about the biology and genetics of reproduction, not sex.

That night we have a bonfire with s’mores. Jamilla, another PCV, starts doing some call and response camp songs. When Boom Chicka Boom begins, I jump up with enthusiasm. I have not sung my favorite verses of this camp classic in years and I am absurdly excited.

The new BRO Club president hands
out certificates to his Bros.

Living in my community in rural Botha Bothe, I forget that I am great working with youth. I keep myself busy with Grassroot Soccer programs, teaching life skills at school, and working with the women in myorganization. This work, however, happens predominantly in Sesotho. When I work in Sesotho, I find I lose the playfulness of my personality and I have to work so much harder to convey my content or explain activities. At camps like GLOW and BRO, however, I am working with high school students, who are more accustomed to English. I find my personality returns and the work is more fun and less work. It is a great reminder as to what had me teaching in the classroom, on ships, and in the woods.

So that said, thanks Yolanda for all of your efforts in planning this camp. And thanks to the rest of the camp staff-‘M’e ‘Mahlapi, Adrian, Corinne, Ryan, Jamilla, and Danielle-working with you was wonderful!

Adrian catches a water balloon during a relay.